Notes from the Movie Business

Here are ten things you may not have known about the cinema:

1. You're probably eating yesterday's popcorn. Like, 50% of the time.
2. The irony of the amount of waste produced by the average screening of Wall-E is lost on everyone.
3. The nacho cheese comes in big cardboard boxes. It's liquid at room temperature.
4. People drink in the cinema. I once found a bag full of empty bottles of Smirnoff Ice.
5. They play the film even if there's no one in the screen. Spooky.
6. If you brought me a bouquet of roses, it couldn't make me any happier than bringing your own rubbish down after the movie is over.
   
7. There is a twenty-eight year old usher who has been there as long as anyone can remember and will never make supervisor. That is his life. It's a little depressing.
8. When I'm standing at the front of the screen with a bag in my hand, it means I'm waiting for you to leave so I can clean up. There probably isn't one of those cutscenes after the credits, and if there is, it's almost definitely not worth seeing. So just LEAVE already.
9. The phrase, “It's just downstairs to your right” gets real old real fast.
10. Who wants to see Hancock? A lot of people, apparently. Although why is anybody's guess.